A tragic comedy of a day
Or maybe a comic tragedy?
January 17: A play in one act
We are in a room that seems to be part of a mansion, perhaps on an enormous estate. Through the window can be seen a large grove of trees, perhaps an orchard of some sort. It’s spring, and the trees are blooming with small white blossoms. Ben enters, followed by Anne.Ben: The train…or something like a train…has come. What year is it?
Anne, consulting a calendar: It says here it’s 1920.
Ben: I never thought a train like this would arrive. But look at me, I’m a fine one today, making such a fool of myself! Coming out all the way to this time and place only to be surprised at what happens. What a shame. Who woke me?
Anne: I didn’t realize today was your day. I think some others are coming.
Ben: Nope…there’s a lot of baggage to this day. Don’t worry about waking me; it’s your day too, but long after mine, after all. When was it? Yours, I mean?
Anne: 1820. A hundred years ago today.
Ben: Ah, see, and mine was 1706. But had you heard of me?
Anne: Perhaps. But let’s talk about Michelle; her day hasn’t even come yet, and who knows what she’ll be like this early. Maybe it changes her…she’s a good person. And uncomplicated, easygoing, straightforward kind of person. Easy to be with. I remember, when I was just a girl, my late father — he kept a little shop here in town. It’s as clear as if it were yesterday, he told me about Giovanni. Giovanni da Verrazzano setting sail, right on my birthday, but take away nearly 300 years. He was searching for the passage to the Pacific, you know.
Ben: There wasn’t one. Or isn’t one. Bah, the tenses of language defeat me, the state I’m in now.
Konstantin enters, carrying a satchel full of scripts.
Konstantin: Here, Anton sent these. He said to put them in the dining room next to the bowl of cherries. Today is the day for cherries, you know.
Ben: Is there any cider left?
Anne: No, it all spilled. The Northridge tremor, you know.
Ben: I thought there was some left after that.
Anne: There was, but then the next year exactly was the one in Hanshin. Even worse. And tipped over the rest of the cider.
Ben: That was, what, 95?
Konstantin: Hanshin was 95. So that makes Northridge…let me think…
Ben: 94, of course. You fine arts fellows ought to spend more time studying your maths.
Konstantin: Only ever need to count up to four acts, and not even that high most of the time. But I’ll be going. Must see to all the convergences of events, especially today, it being my day and all. Impossible! It’s just amazing! Who would have thought?
Konstantin leaves.
A group of people enter: Muhammed, wearing shorts; Michelle in a coat; and Zooey carrying a bundle and an umbrella.Michelle: Let’s go through here…oh mama, but this is a nice room!
Muhammed: The train arrived, and it’s about time. That change is right in line with what I think we should…
Zooey: It’s not gonna last, you know.
Ben: Thirteen years. That’s all. And you know very well what it brings with it.
Al enters, wearing a sharp, if somewhat old-fashioned suit.Al: It brings high times for me and mine.
Muhammed: It’s a good idea, to my mind. It floats like a butterfly.
Al: I’d like to float all the way up to 1950; that was a good day in my books.
Michelle: How so?
Al: That great Brinks thing. It’s over in Boston, where I never been. I’m a Chicago boy.
Michelle: I’m from Chicago. In 64, though, so I missed you and the Brinks thing, whatever that was.
Al: Hey, exactly 65 years after me!
Zooey: Then I’m 81 after you, how about that, pretty boy?
Al: Nah, that ain’t me. That was Charlie; he won’t be around today. His day’s coming up pretty soon though.
Konstantin enters.Konstantin: Anyone for a game? Billiards, perchance? Or eight ball? Or to commemorate the day, four ball, instead?
Zooey: There’s such a thing as four ball? I can do some card tricks, but I don’t know that one.
Konstantin ignores her, staring out the window.
Konstantin: The orchard’s all white. Look at the long alley, it runs so straight, so straight, all the way down, like a stretched out belt, and shimmers on a moonlit night.
Michelle: I prefer the sunlight.
Muhammed: The sunlight! Life! Springtime!
Curtain
The players, all born January 17:
Ben Franklin, 1706
Anne Bronte, 1820
Konstantin Stanislavski, 1863
Al Capone, 1899
Muhammed Ali, 1942
Michelle Obama, 1964
Zooey Deschanel, 1980
The events, all occurring on January 17:
Giovanni da Verrazano sets sail westward from Madeira in search of a passage to the Pacific Ocean, 1524.
The Cherry Orchard by Anton Chekov, debuts in Moscow directed by Konstantin Stanislavsky, 1904.
US Prohibition begins, 1920.
The Great Brinks Robbery in Boston ($2 million heist), 1950.
The Northridge earthquake (6.7 Mw)  in Los Angeles, 1994.
The Great Hanshin earthquake (6.9 Mw) in Honshu, Japan, 1995.
